Like me she's a fellow breast cancer survivor, but newly so. She had a mastectomy in April but then found out that she has the BRCA gene, which increases your chance of further breast cancer in the healthy breast and ovarian cancer. The only choice really, at this stage is to go for preventative surgery. This lady is going in for a total hysterectomy, followed by a further mastectomy a few weeks later. What a brave lady. She has a family and said that she would obviously do anything to increase her rates of survival. Who wouldn't? That's exactly what I did. Not because I have the BRCA gene but because of the side effects of tamoxifen.
What surprised me though was that she was apprehensive of this next surgery. For me, after my original surgery, I was fairly relaxed about my hysterectomy, even to the point where I sent a photo to Ben and Bex whilst I was in my attractive theatre gown and cap; well to be honest I was a bit high on my pre-med but that's not the point! I didn't cry before this surgery either. I suppose that with the first surgery we had no idea what the surgeon would find, whereas my hysterectomy was almost totally elective, so theoretically there wouldn't be anything scary to be found, as my oncologist had taken me off tamoxifen as soon as I had dodgy results.
She was very clear and concise with her questions, perhaps even had them written down, I don't know. But it was lovely to be able to talk her through my experience as she is with the same surgeon and going to the same hospital. Obviously everyone is different and will heal from surgery differently; her menopause will be different to mine but she will find herself thrown into it full on with no gradual pre menopause to ease her into it. It's a bit of a physical shock to say the least. I was also able to give her advice on what natural supplements will help with her symptoms as due to our breast cancers being positive receptors for hormones means that we are unable to take hormone replacement therapy. A huge no-no.
'A cancer is called estrogen-receptor-positive (or ER+) if it has receptors for estrogen. This suggests that the cancer cells, like normal breast cells, may receive signals from estrogen that could promote their growth. The cancer is progesterone-receptor-positive (PR+) if it has progesterone receptors. Again, this means that the cancer cells may receive signals from progesterone that could promote their growth. Roughly two out of every three breast cancers test positive for hormone receptors.'
This means that all care apart from prescribed cancer medication can only be natural and checked with both your oncologist and pharmacist to make sure there aren't any contraindications to the drugs being taken. So to be honest there's a limited amount you can do to ease your menopause apart from coping mechanisms. But that's not all doom and gloom, I pop a large amount of supplements everyday and so far I'm still in one piece!
It was so nice, though, to be able to pay it forward. To help someone who was going to go through what I had been through. I was very self sufficient whilst I dealt with my cancer, I didn't feel the need to join a support group; I'm blessed with an amazing family who supported me through it all, and still do. I'm aware though that some ladies do need to talk it through with fellow survivors so when she asked if she could include me in a small group called Pink Ladies Middle East, I was happy to say yes. They have a group Whatsapp chat and if anyone of them have a question or is worried about something then through the chat it goes, and between them they come up with an answer or reassurance. So if I can pass on any of my experience and help one of these ladies, I'm more than happy to.
This isn't the first time I've been asked to speak with a cancer patient, so I guess my Drs must think I'm ok to turn to. My listening hat is on for anyone who needs it. Surely that's how the world should be. I don't claim to have the answers but I can advise and just listen. I can reassure and perhaps explain some of the simpler stuff. I can help. Which is exactly what this lady wanted. To talk to someone who had been where she is going.
If she sleeps a bit better tonight, then I've done a good thing. I hope she does.