Ok, this is my third attempt at writing a blog for Breast Cancer Awareness month. I'm really struggling. Not because I survived breast cancer, no that's not my problem. It was something that happened to me and is in the past. Like all life experiences I won't forget it, but I have chosen to use the experience as a lesson to enjoy my life, feel blessed with all that I have and to pay my experiences forward. It doesn't define me. The thing that upsets me is the negativity towards any media campaign. I understand completely the pure fear that cancer awakens within you; it grips you like the claws of death and you pull back as hard as you can with the scratches raw on your heart and soul. I know that every single person, no matter what form of cancer they have deals with it in their own way; some never come to terms with it even when they survive.
"Awareness is the ability to perceive, to feel, or to be conscious of events, objects, thoughts, emotions, or sensory patterns. In this level of consciousness, sense data can be confirmed by an observer without necessarily implying understanding. More broadly, it is the state or quality of being aware of something."
Media campaigns are there to raise awareness. For us all to be conscious of things that might or might not affect us either directly or indirectly. Unless you have actually lived through something then you can't fully understand the implications. Why should you? My beautiful Bex has T1 Diabetes and I have lived with her through this and am very aware of her life but can I understand how it affects her every day life? Of course not, it is her condition to live with and deal with. But I am more than happy with all the media campaigns that are trying to raise awareness of this condition.
What I don't understand is why so many women are angry at the media for trying to raise awareness in a people friendly way. Ok, so many of the media and FB campaigns come across as frivolous. But many also come across as too dark and intimidating. The rant about #showyourstrap is an unnecessary waste of energy. To me there's nothing demoralising or sexualising about the campaign. If you want to be mad at someone, rant at the government and NHS for not giving both mammograms and ultrasounds to all women over the age of 40; be mad that you don't get proper follow ups in the uk once you've survived your first year. That you're not monitored for uterine changes whilst you are on tamoxifen. Having breast cancer here in Dubai has saved my life whilst if I was in the uk they still would not have found it, nor would they have picked up that the tamoxifen was causing life threatening changes to my uterus leading to a hysterectomy to avoid uterine cancer and/or ovarian. I wouldn't be getting yearly DEXA scans to monitor my bone density. My surgeon would have discharged me instead of seeing me every six months along with my oncologist to ensure that I am completely in the clear. Six monthly blood tests and scans to reassure both me and them. Of course my insurance company pays for this but they are doing all this because they care. They are part of charity organisations that pay for treatment for men and women who don't have adequate insurance; they give up their free time for their patients. I even have my surgeon and gyneas mobile numbers so I can contact them if I have any worries. These aren't people who are in it for the money or cutting corners. They're doing this because they care deeply.
I for one am happy with any media coverage. Show your scars of you want, show your bra if you want to. Burn your bra, wear it on your head, anything that makes women of all ages check themselves and go for check ups is a good thing in my eyes. As for going without a bra, it was the one of the happiest days when I could finally go to bed without wearing a bra at night, when I could take it off and let my skin breathe for an evening. Infact my bra makes me feel sexy and feminine. I chose not to have plastic surgery leaving me very wonky and misshapen but I'm ok with that. My husband doesn't care, why should I. Yes, I would have had reconstruction if I'd had a total mastectomy but I had a third of my breast removed and I just buy a style of bra that balances me out to the onlooker. My friends know the discrepancy, but no one else would to look at me. Now, you do too!
If we post the ugly side of cancer some people will be scared off, they'll be too scared to get checked as they will fear the treatment they might need. We aren't stupid, we know the ugliness of the disease, but we do need to make sure that money is continued being raised, that young and old women don't live in fear, avoiding the obvious. Of course we need to show the reality but let us on the occasion of Pinktober pretty it up in pink. I love wearing my pink badges, pink nail varnish, even pink in my hair. I for one am not offended by any awareness campaign if it saves lives and manages to raise money to help fund research towards beating this disease. I don't want my daughter to experience breast cancer, she already has an increased risk due to me having had it. I don't want my children to worry about their children being at risk. So today when I'm out and about I shall #showMYstrap
"#ShowYourStrap is about raising money, awareness and ultimately showing solidarity. It is part of our commitment to raising £13 million over the next five years to fund vital research into breast cancer prevention."
And before I'm beaten up and get an influx of angry responses I am VERY aware of all the aspects of cancer, it's deadly effects and what women are living with. This is a blog and to cover all bases it would become a book. For further information on all forms of breast cancer, both primary and secondary, please look it up as I have and still do. There is more to this disease than the media coverage but at least we are getting coverage unlike many debilitating conditions and diseases that are either ignored or completely misrepresented.
"Awareness is the ability to perceive, to feel, or to be conscious of events, objects, thoughts, emotions, or sensory patterns. In this level of consciousness, sense data can be confirmed by an observer without necessarily implying understanding. More broadly, it is the state or quality of being aware of something."
Media campaigns are there to raise awareness. For us all to be conscious of things that might or might not affect us either directly or indirectly. Unless you have actually lived through something then you can't fully understand the implications. Why should you? My beautiful Bex has T1 Diabetes and I have lived with her through this and am very aware of her life but can I understand how it affects her every day life? Of course not, it is her condition to live with and deal with. But I am more than happy with all the media campaigns that are trying to raise awareness of this condition.
What I don't understand is why so many women are angry at the media for trying to raise awareness in a people friendly way. Ok, so many of the media and FB campaigns come across as frivolous. But many also come across as too dark and intimidating. The rant about #showyourstrap is an unnecessary waste of energy. To me there's nothing demoralising or sexualising about the campaign. If you want to be mad at someone, rant at the government and NHS for not giving both mammograms and ultrasounds to all women over the age of 40; be mad that you don't get proper follow ups in the uk once you've survived your first year. That you're not monitored for uterine changes whilst you are on tamoxifen. Having breast cancer here in Dubai has saved my life whilst if I was in the uk they still would not have found it, nor would they have picked up that the tamoxifen was causing life threatening changes to my uterus leading to a hysterectomy to avoid uterine cancer and/or ovarian. I wouldn't be getting yearly DEXA scans to monitor my bone density. My surgeon would have discharged me instead of seeing me every six months along with my oncologist to ensure that I am completely in the clear. Six monthly blood tests and scans to reassure both me and them. Of course my insurance company pays for this but they are doing all this because they care. They are part of charity organisations that pay for treatment for men and women who don't have adequate insurance; they give up their free time for their patients. I even have my surgeon and gyneas mobile numbers so I can contact them if I have any worries. These aren't people who are in it for the money or cutting corners. They're doing this because they care deeply.
I for one am happy with any media coverage. Show your scars of you want, show your bra if you want to. Burn your bra, wear it on your head, anything that makes women of all ages check themselves and go for check ups is a good thing in my eyes. As for going without a bra, it was the one of the happiest days when I could finally go to bed without wearing a bra at night, when I could take it off and let my skin breathe for an evening. Infact my bra makes me feel sexy and feminine. I chose not to have plastic surgery leaving me very wonky and misshapen but I'm ok with that. My husband doesn't care, why should I. Yes, I would have had reconstruction if I'd had a total mastectomy but I had a third of my breast removed and I just buy a style of bra that balances me out to the onlooker. My friends know the discrepancy, but no one else would to look at me. Now, you do too!
If we post the ugly side of cancer some people will be scared off, they'll be too scared to get checked as they will fear the treatment they might need. We aren't stupid, we know the ugliness of the disease, but we do need to make sure that money is continued being raised, that young and old women don't live in fear, avoiding the obvious. Of course we need to show the reality but let us on the occasion of Pinktober pretty it up in pink. I love wearing my pink badges, pink nail varnish, even pink in my hair. I for one am not offended by any awareness campaign if it saves lives and manages to raise money to help fund research towards beating this disease. I don't want my daughter to experience breast cancer, she already has an increased risk due to me having had it. I don't want my children to worry about their children being at risk. So today when I'm out and about I shall #showMYstrap
"#ShowYourStrap is about raising money, awareness and ultimately showing solidarity. It is part of our commitment to raising £13 million over the next five years to fund vital research into breast cancer prevention."
And before I'm beaten up and get an influx of angry responses I am VERY aware of all the aspects of cancer, it's deadly effects and what women are living with. This is a blog and to cover all bases it would become a book. For further information on all forms of breast cancer, both primary and secondary, please look it up as I have and still do. There is more to this disease than the media coverage but at least we are getting coverage unlike many debilitating conditions and diseases that are either ignored or completely misrepresented.