Sometimes it's ok just to stop.
We live in a world where everything has to be now, immediate, instant. We want instant gratification. We want it all and we want it now.
There are times in our lives where it is ok to stop and just breathe. We need to regroup, reassess, and mentally heal. When I was nursing I remember one of the senior staff nurses saying that sleep was as important to healing as all the other treatments we might be providing. Sleep helps our whirling minds to slow down, to stop the often chaotic thoughts.
I'm a massive worry wort. I can worry about everything and nothing. I worry if I don't hear from Ben and Bex. I worry about my mum who has memory loss and is 80. I worry about my Dicky B driving to work on the roads out here. Today I'm worried about the OSN repair men coming back for the 5th time to fix a problem they don't believe we have. And I constantly worry about cancer.
But I also look for the good in life. I know that my constant worrying is detrimental to my life, so I turn my worries around. Ben and Bex would call me if something was wrong. Mum has great carers that visit her daily and they would call me if they needed to. Rick has a four wheel drive and knows there are idiots on the roads. OSN is really just TV so what's there to worry about, it's their job to find the problem and fix. And I'm checked every 3-6 months for cancer, I have the most amazing care, so if any sign of cancer dared show it's ugly face it would be dealt with instantly.
But I really learnt to just stop after I got fatigue as a side effect to treatment and medication. The thing about fatigue is that you can't beat it, you have to accept it and find a new normal. The normal that you have now become due to your own personal journey. And that's ok. Whilst I was going through my radiotherapy I was completely drained. Obviously all my healing energy was being directed to the area that was getting blitzed everyday. So I'd do my round trip of 2 1/2 hours, get home and just sit. Most days I couldn't even prepare dinner for my lovely hubby, opening a prepared salad was too much. Friends would offer to come round to keep me company, they'd offer to drive me to the cancer centre, but to be honest, as much as I appreciated their care and concern, I just needed to stop. I needed to slow my mind down. I needed to mentally heal as well as physically.
So, I found myself on Pinterest looking at inspirational quotes, reading how to deal with the fatigue. Learning that it really is ok to stop and heal. Now I give myself one day a week, normally Wednesday, and I do nothing. I don't leave the house. I do my exercises, I sit by the pool for a short time, I read, I give myself a facial and I choose not to worry about the little things knowing they'll take care of themselves. It's on a Wednesday that I FaceTime my mum, it's my day and she likes hearing about what I'm doing, which book I'm reading. She laughs when I tell her about my facials, she complains that I need to get my hair cut! It's an important part of my Just Stop Wednesday; she's a very important part of it.
But the thing about fatigue is that it's invisible. You can't see how tired I am. Sleep isn't going to prevent it. I often wake up as tired as I went to sleep. So slowing down and working out your week is important. If I've a busy few days ahead I know I'll need a day either side just to stop; to do nothing that's very challenging. It took me months to accept this new normal. I read about other cancer survivors still fighting against their fatigue, still letting it define them. Don't. Let it go. We aren't the only people who suffer from chronic conditions. There are people much worse than us. People who also have to regulate their weekly energy quota. A lot of it can be mind over matter, as in we can either let this define who we are and become victims of something we can't control, or we accept it for what it is, learn how to monitor our lives and move on. I chose to move on. I have no more control over this as a diabetic or asthmatic has over their conditions. Invisible conditions that they have no choice but to live with and overcome. Lupus is another condition that is do debilitating and my very dear friend suffers from it, but you would never know to look at her. She chooses to live her life to the full, measuring her energy levels, often using a whole weeks worth in one day but still carrying on. To truly understand fatigue in it's many secret forms read The Spoon Theory written by Christine Miserandino
It sums up life for anyone suffering with a chronic condition. It's simply put and makes perfect sense.
But this brings me back to it's ok to just stop. Whether you have a chronic condition or not, whether you just have a crazy busy life. Take the time to sit and do something you enjoy. Not because you have to but because you want to. Put down your phone, tablet, PC, switch off your TV. Read a book, watch the sunset, paint a picture, meditate. Whatever it is that gives your brain a time out, do it.
Just STOP. You'll feel better for it.
We live in a world where everything has to be now, immediate, instant. We want instant gratification. We want it all and we want it now.
There are times in our lives where it is ok to stop and just breathe. We need to regroup, reassess, and mentally heal. When I was nursing I remember one of the senior staff nurses saying that sleep was as important to healing as all the other treatments we might be providing. Sleep helps our whirling minds to slow down, to stop the often chaotic thoughts.
I'm a massive worry wort. I can worry about everything and nothing. I worry if I don't hear from Ben and Bex. I worry about my mum who has memory loss and is 80. I worry about my Dicky B driving to work on the roads out here. Today I'm worried about the OSN repair men coming back for the 5th time to fix a problem they don't believe we have. And I constantly worry about cancer.
But I also look for the good in life. I know that my constant worrying is detrimental to my life, so I turn my worries around. Ben and Bex would call me if something was wrong. Mum has great carers that visit her daily and they would call me if they needed to. Rick has a four wheel drive and knows there are idiots on the roads. OSN is really just TV so what's there to worry about, it's their job to find the problem and fix. And I'm checked every 3-6 months for cancer, I have the most amazing care, so if any sign of cancer dared show it's ugly face it would be dealt with instantly.
But I really learnt to just stop after I got fatigue as a side effect to treatment and medication. The thing about fatigue is that you can't beat it, you have to accept it and find a new normal. The normal that you have now become due to your own personal journey. And that's ok. Whilst I was going through my radiotherapy I was completely drained. Obviously all my healing energy was being directed to the area that was getting blitzed everyday. So I'd do my round trip of 2 1/2 hours, get home and just sit. Most days I couldn't even prepare dinner for my lovely hubby, opening a prepared salad was too much. Friends would offer to come round to keep me company, they'd offer to drive me to the cancer centre, but to be honest, as much as I appreciated their care and concern, I just needed to stop. I needed to slow my mind down. I needed to mentally heal as well as physically.
So, I found myself on Pinterest looking at inspirational quotes, reading how to deal with the fatigue. Learning that it really is ok to stop and heal. Now I give myself one day a week, normally Wednesday, and I do nothing. I don't leave the house. I do my exercises, I sit by the pool for a short time, I read, I give myself a facial and I choose not to worry about the little things knowing they'll take care of themselves. It's on a Wednesday that I FaceTime my mum, it's my day and she likes hearing about what I'm doing, which book I'm reading. She laughs when I tell her about my facials, she complains that I need to get my hair cut! It's an important part of my Just Stop Wednesday; she's a very important part of it.
But the thing about fatigue is that it's invisible. You can't see how tired I am. Sleep isn't going to prevent it. I often wake up as tired as I went to sleep. So slowing down and working out your week is important. If I've a busy few days ahead I know I'll need a day either side just to stop; to do nothing that's very challenging. It took me months to accept this new normal. I read about other cancer survivors still fighting against their fatigue, still letting it define them. Don't. Let it go. We aren't the only people who suffer from chronic conditions. There are people much worse than us. People who also have to regulate their weekly energy quota. A lot of it can be mind over matter, as in we can either let this define who we are and become victims of something we can't control, or we accept it for what it is, learn how to monitor our lives and move on. I chose to move on. I have no more control over this as a diabetic or asthmatic has over their conditions. Invisible conditions that they have no choice but to live with and overcome. Lupus is another condition that is do debilitating and my very dear friend suffers from it, but you would never know to look at her. She chooses to live her life to the full, measuring her energy levels, often using a whole weeks worth in one day but still carrying on. To truly understand fatigue in it's many secret forms read The Spoon Theory written by Christine Miserandino
It sums up life for anyone suffering with a chronic condition. It's simply put and makes perfect sense.
But this brings me back to it's ok to just stop. Whether you have a chronic condition or not, whether you just have a crazy busy life. Take the time to sit and do something you enjoy. Not because you have to but because you want to. Put down your phone, tablet, PC, switch off your TV. Read a book, watch the sunset, paint a picture, meditate. Whatever it is that gives your brain a time out, do it.
Just STOP. You'll feel better for it.